It's OK to not feel OK.

By The Center KSQ
May 25, 2021
AmyH

Ever wonder about Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, or Kate Spade? Huge successes. Passionate in their careers. And often seen smiling, carrying on, only to decide to take what one of my favorite humans of all time calls the “self checkout line.”

Depression. What is it about depression that is so illustrious?

Us. The environment that depression grows in, meaning our culture.

The dance to avoid the uncomfortable that we do is no different than those that use drugs abusively. Yes, avoidance and addiction are one in the same. So if you are an addict judger, but avoid the heavy lifting of feelings, take a look in the mirror. You are the very same as what you condemn.

People who struggle to feel joy in their hearts can also AT THE SAME TIME:

•smile

•laugh

•engage in social outings

•be the life of the party

And

•have wildly successful, super engaging careers

What makes the monster that lives in the depression closet even more confusing is that depression:

•comes and goes, but comes back again. And then goes. And then returns.... plays peek a boo, hide and seek, freeze tag, all of the reindeer games that make it impossible to know its cadence. And this can happen all in one day! Or within an hour’s time...

•comes during the highlight of our year, despite the misconception that it’s a winter affliction only

•doesn't come into our lives because we are mentally ill or inherited it from the generation prior to our arrival here on this wildly confusing planet called Earth

Depression isn’t mental illness. It’s a natural response to not feeling like you fit, like you have a place here that makes sense, to lost hopes and dreams, to working terribly hard beyond your own personal limits, to living in a world where the social currency and value system is extraordinarily f**ked up. And my all time favorite, depression happens because many of us are awake to how completely spiritually void so many people are, and it’s hard to carry that awareness in a world where so many people wear blinders.

It’s okay to not feel okay. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed by just how very underwhelming it can all be, this life.

Seek help, support, love and nurturing. You deserve it. We all do.